I have found it almost impossible to put into words just how big of an impact losing Kiena has been. On all her family, her beautiful baby girl and all her friends.
Kiena was a rare gem. She brought so much love and kindness to this world and to everyone who loved her, she was an extremely beautiful girl, and was quite truly the sweetest kindest and gentlest person I have ever known.
Kiena is missed so much every second of every day. Her baby girl was brought to my home a few hours after Kiena was found, and has been in my full time care ever since that tragic day, and I honestly cannot put into words just how much it breaks my heart that her beautiful baby doesn’t have her mummy here because of that monster.
I’ll never forget the day when three CID officers came to my house shortly after I lost Kiena. And I simply said ‘Ryan Wellings killed my baby’ and I will fight for her justice.
I truly hope that no other young lady or child has to go through what he did to my daughter and her baby. I just wish with all my heart that I could bring her back and say ‘It is ok, you’re safe now’.
I have been asked to talk about the impact that losing Kiena and the crimes that have been committed have had on me. I have talked briefly about this already, above and in my previous statements. There are a few areas that I will go into a little more detail around, however I am feeling like my words may make little difference, but it is important for me to say the following.
I have been robbed of watching my daughter live her life, and her baby girl have her Mummy.
I will never get to hold any other children that Kiena may have had in the future or watch Kiena live her life as she should have.
As [my granddaughter] grows into a young lady herself, she been robbed herself of a Mum to go to, or when she has children herself, her own mother to turn to, but I will step into this role for Kiena.
I will never be able to live a normal life due to the coercive and controlling behaviour and assaults that Kiena suffered.
The loss of Kiena resulted in [my granddaughter] as a baby having separation anxiety and this is something that I have had to deal with in the early days of her being in my care.
On many occasions, inclusive of the 11th of July 2022, [my granddaughter] was exposed to and witnessed extreme domestic abuse and violence against her Mummy. I work through this to the best of my ability and will continue to do so as she grows into a young lady.
Another example is that [my granddaughter] has already asked me where her mummy is. I have found it impossible to answer that question, along with the simplest of questions like what [she] calls me. I know that I am her grandma, but simply contemplating explaining this to her is impossible.
In terms of my own health, the impact has been significant. In the early days after Kiena’s death, I struggled to function or eat properly. I can still recall now the first time that I left the house with [my granddaughter] after she came into my care, I had social anxiety and was fearful of going out and seeing people, it was a huge deal to initially leave the house. I have sought medical support for this and the impact on my health will be long term. As a direct result of what happened to Kiena, I have been diagnosed with PTSD and anxiety for which I am supported by my Doctor. I have also suffered from frequent nightmares, flash backs to Kiena lying on a train line, and find that simple things like a television programme may trigger memories, due to the story lines or content they may have.
Prior to the July 2022, I worked and I had actually confided in a couple of colleagues about the impact of the domestic abuse on Kiena. I did not return to work after the 11th of July 2022, when Kiena was last assaulted by Wellings. That day, I had to call my manager and explain that Kiena had been badly assaulted, I sent her a couple of photos so that I didn’t have to explain too much as I was sat with Kiena. I was told that day that I wouldn’t get paid, as it wasn’t me that was injured. Prior to this at work, I always made sure that I had my phone with me should Kiena need me and I was always checking my phone in case Kiena had rang or messaged me. The future that I thought I would have now looks very different in terms of finishing work and retiring, as [my granddaughter’s] care and upbringing is my absolute main priority. This, however, will be an honour and a privilege to raise my daughter’s girl.
I feel like I have lived Kiena’s domestic abuse with her, and what I mean by this is that I was her main source of support, and I experienced the full range of emotions that Kiena had to go through with her. I was so scared of saying the wrong thing to Kiena, as I needed her to know that she could come to me anytime and I didn’t want her to close up. There were times that I would find out that things had happened a couple of days afterwards, such as the black eye in July 2021, and I know that sometimes Kiena tried to protect me by not saying things.
As a mother, you do everything that you can to help your child and I have had to live through watching my daughter tell me that she was terrified and trapped, and when she said these things, it literally took my breath away, as I didn’t know how to help, I felt helpless. After an incident with Wellings, Kiena would come to be safe and stay with me, I can only explain that I would see a light coming back on, and that she would get some strength, but Wellings always found a way to take back control and take her strength away.
It is heart wrenching to see your child hurt from anything, even by accident, but seeing your daughter hurt by someone else is sickening.
Kiena always took my advice, and she always asked for help and she tried to do the right thing.
I have moved home so that I can not only have space and a comfortable home for [my granddaughter], but also initially I lived by a train track which I could just not continue with. Kiena was my best friend and I have struggled to do the things that we used to do together, for example we would often go for tea together. I have shut a lot of people out of my life to just get through the days, and to protect [my granddaughter] and I. Fortunately, my friends and family are understanding of this and always there for me.
Wellings has never admitted to the awful acts he committed against my daughter. I have had to sit through an almost six-week trial and watch the private life of my daughter pulled apart and her mental health scrutinised and assessed. She has been violated. There is no other word for it.
It has also been extremely traumatic for me to see Kiena so upset talking to police officers and to look back retrospectively at her so helpless in life and reaching out for help, knowing what ultimately happened to her. Watching videos of her crying and upset whilst also pregnant or cuddling her baby has been horrific. It is hard enough to watch videos of her having fun and laughing. Ryan Wellings has put me through all that. He could have pleaded to the offences and we would never have faced all that, with the eyes of the public on us all. This has been a trauma in itself.
Whenever Wellings is released from prison, I will be extremely concerned that he will do this again, he is a dangerous man. I am at a loss as to consider what impact him being released from prison will have on other women and children.
What my future holds now is being strong enough to raise [my granddaughter]. I cannot accept what has happened to Kiena and that as a result of this, she is not here. I have been robbed of my daughter.